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Susan Alexander Yates

Susan Alexander Yates

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A Little Chaos and a Lot of Love: Building Lifetime Bonds

by Susan Alexander Yates

Hey Friends, I know we’ve all been cooped up for a while now, and we have no idea how long this will last. In the midst of all the hard things, we still need to laugh and we still want to plan for better times. My desire is that the following video blog will give you a break from daily news and inspire you to dream for the future!


I hope you’ve had a chance to watch the video describing our Cousin Camp. It will answer questions like how do you do it, who do you invite, where do  you have it, what does a schedule look like, how long does camp last, what works and doesn’t work, what lessons have you learned? 

Over the years, we’ve made lots of mistakes, shed tears, laughed uproariously, thrown out plans, separated quarrelling kids, cheered when kindness overcame selfishness, and fallen into bed exhausted, but above all we’ve had a blast. Seeing two girl cousins who used to fight like cats now snuggling on our bedroom floor in sleeping bags, giggling together, makes it all worth it.

When we think of planning an event, we typically begin with the program. Who should we invite? Where should we have it? What should we do? Will we have a theme? We design a wonderful party or reunion that most people enjoy—but then it’s over. When planning a family gathering, we need to ask:

While the event might have good results, will they last? What if we carefully considered the goals of our event and the needs of the people attending? Would this enable a fun event to have more of a long-term impact?

In Chapter 2 of Cousin Camp, I describe how older mentors, Chuck and Cathy Miller, gave use a new paradigm for planning any type of event–a paradigm that has radically changed not only how we approach family reunions, but also our life in ministry, our family schedules and fresh ways to pray for our kids.

This week I thought it would be fun for you to hear from the eldest of our twenty-one grandchildren, Callie Gaskins. At our first Cousin Camp, we had five cousins–three siblings and two cousins from two different families. Callie was ten and the others were eight, five, five, and four. Today Callie is twenty-two and about to graduate from college. We have now hosted eleven years of “Cousin Camp.”

Here’s Callie in a spontaneous, unrehearsed, unedited chat with me:

Cousin Camp is an inspiring, practical book that outlines how grandparents can plan and host a camp. Grandmother to 21 grandchildren, Susan Yates has been creating cousin camps for years. Now she passes on what she’s learned so you can help your children and grandchildren develop meaningful, lasting connections with each other–and with you!

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Here is the text of Callie’s blog post, originally published after Cousin Camp 2016:

Why Cousin Camp is Worth the Loss of Sleep

by Callie Gaskins, our eldest grandaughter

I’d say I’m exhausted, but that would be a gross understatement.

Exhausted, ecstatic, wistful… the list goes on. I’m less than twelve hours out from Cousin Camp 2016 and at this point I don’t really know what hit me. I spent the weekend enveloped in chaos and occasionally sweet cousin cuddles, but in my tired state everything seems like a blur.

Yes, we did sit through morning quiet times and afternoon rest periods, but those brief instances of “calm” are overshadowed by the pandemonium of the rest of the weekend. Traditions such as receiving fun tee shirts made by our uncle, a trip to the vineyard for a picnic, and the induction of the new campers into the “Band of Cousins” were complemented by the introduction of teams (“for cooperation, not competition” as Ghee insisted to no avail) and the highlight of the weekend, a giant obstacle course.

However, all of these planned activities, while fun, were certainly not the highlight of Cousin Camp—they never are. The real highlights were the impromptu things: precariously stacking five Eno hammocks on top of one another, catching what is probably the second largest fish to ever come out of the pond, one of the boys insisting that watermelon is a Fruit of the Spirit, and guacamole making competitions, among other things.

These delightful times serve as catalysts for what I hope will be life­long relationships between us cousins.

Cousin Camp 2016

As I lay in bed on Sunday night trying not to wake the cousin asleep next to me, I couldn’t help but think back on the past nine years of Cousin Camp. From the “fab five” in 2008 to the “terrific twenty one” this year, camp has always been a highlight of my summer.

Although I may complain about my role occasionally, I am so lucky to be the eldest. I’ve been able to watch all twenty of these little ones grow up, finally make it to age four, attend their first Cousin Camp, and end the weekend excited for the next year. These sweet ones are a huge part of my life, and I can only hope that as I head off to Charlottesville in the fall I won’t be leaving this behind. I don’t want to be a distant memory for the youngest two, but someone who is as important to them as they have been to me.

I’m so grateful that my grandparents instituted the tradition of Cousin Camp because it is the perfect way to ensure that there will always be a reason for us to get together, year after year.


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Cousin Camp
March 25, 2020 · 14 Comments

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Comments

  1. Ken Wright says

    June 9, 2016 at 2:15 am

    Remarkable family legacy, blessing and lesson for all of us to see! The video is a masterpiece of God’s workmanship through your grand daughter’s obvious gifts ! Thank you for sharing with us,

    Reply
  2. Sue Vernalis says

    June 9, 2016 at 2:11 am

    Beautiful, both the video, and the whole camp. And your whole family, for that matter! What a blessing you and John are to these lovely grandchildren and to so many of us through your godly example!

    Reply
  3. Jenna says

    June 5, 2016 at 7:11 am

    Callie- I’m not sure if you’ll see this comment, but I am simply dumbfounded that you are heading off to college this year and are the age that your Aunt Susy and I were when we met!! I remember the morning your mom called to tell Sus you were born! (I was sleeping over in her dorm room). What a wonderful write up on cousin camp and so very special that you are the eldest cousin… much love and all the best next year!

    Reply
  4. Gean Nelson says

    June 4, 2016 at 12:21 pm

    This is so lovely it makes me smile from ear to ear!! Just like I imagined cousin camp would be!!

    Reply
  5. nancy webster says

    June 3, 2016 at 7:27 pm

    Susan, I can’t even imagine 21 kids but it sounds fabulous. My 4 wear me out totally but, like you…I love every minute. Aren’t we blessed. This is the first year ever that I have had both families live so close together ( 1 and 1/2 hours apart). It is easier to see them all together or to go between. What a joy it is to be part of their lives. God is good.

    Reply
  6. Jackie Henneberg says

    June 3, 2016 at 2:30 pm

    I have heard so many wonderful things about Cousins’ Camp over the years – so glad to get this bird’s eye view. What fun!! I think in my next life, I want to come back as a Yates cousin!! Thanks so much, Callie – so well done!!

    Reply
  7. Susan Yates says

    June 2, 2016 at 7:12 pm

    Jennifer,
    Thank you so much for commenting!
    You are an encouragement!
    Love, Susan

    Reply
  8. Jennifer Tricarico says

    June 1, 2016 at 11:47 pm

    Crazy precious!! Gives me glory-bumps thinking of the generational blessing represented in every part of this. Thanks for sharing!

    Reply
  9. Lottie Drennen says

    June 1, 2016 at 11:25 pm

    WOW!! I have heard about Cousins Camp and now I have seen it and I love it!!! Susan, you and John are amazing in so many ways. The blessing of knowing cousins is a generational blessing. Like the ripples in the pond.
    Love this idea and hope I can cousin get-togethers. I have 1 grand on the way so I have time to think about it.
    Just received my book and will read it next week on vacation.
    Love Love

    Reply
    • Susan Yates says

      June 2, 2016 at 7:12 pm

      Lottie, How great to hear from you! Thanks for writing. It is so encouraging to me.
      Love, Susan

      Reply
  10. Esther Powell says

    June 1, 2016 at 9:12 pm

    Callie,
    What a wonderful gift to your grandparents! You are such a model for your younger cousins, and it was my great joy to get to peek in on cousins’ camp this summer. Every blessing and the peace of God go with you as you begin the next season of life. So glad you won’t be far away.

    Reply
    • Susan Yates says

      June 2, 2016 at 7:10 pm

      Thanks Esther. So special to have you come over and thanks for all the grocery shopping!!
      i love you, Susan

      Reply
  11. Teresa Dodd says

    June 1, 2016 at 8:54 pm

    Love seeing this! You all are truly blessed.

    Reply
    • Susan Yates says

      June 2, 2016 at 7:11 pm

      Thanks Teresa!
      We miss you and your family!
      Love, Susan

      Reply

Hello, I’m Susan.

Susan Alexander Yates

I’m a wife (of more than 50 years), mom to five children (including a set of twins), and grandmother to 21 (including a set of quadruplets!). My favorite time of the year is when all my kids and grandkids are together for a week of “cousins and family camp” in the foothills of the Shenandoah Mountains of Virginia.

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Calligraphy by Jessica Blanchard · Paintings by Christen Yates
Blog and Ask Susan Photo by Natalie Puls Photography · Books Photo by Cambria Elizabeth

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