Hey Ladies, since we’ve just had Valentine’s Day I thought it would be good to look at something that’s been key in our marriage. You might feel like your husband doesn’t understand or meet your needs (and that’s a big topic!).
But here’s the thing — we can be hard to please and hard to understand. It’s part of our mystery! It can be enticing but it can also be very frustrating for our husbands. Pleasing us seems simple — to us. But for them it’s not so clear.
Here’s some encouragement to pass along to the men in your life: your husband, friend, son, etc.
John and I, still having fun after 52 years!
Hey Guys,
For over 52 years I’ve had the privilege of being married to my husband John, and I’ve also had the fun of hanging out with many young couples. I want to encourage you. I know we wives can be tough to understand and no matter what you do, it hardly ever seems it’s enough!
Recently a friend asked my husband, “After all these years do you understand your wife? “Understand her—no way,” he laughed. “Enjoy her, yes!”
I want to give you a hint that just might help you in understanding 2 of your wife’s needs. Picture for a moment a flashlight. One that takes 2 “Double A” batteries. Over time it’s easy for these batteries to grow dim. They just get worn down. Sometimes one will go out before the other. Soon the flashlight will begin to flicker and the light will fade. It’s time to recharge, to put new batteries into your flashlight.
Photo by hilhal2012 on Pexels
We women need 2 batteries to keep us bright. Our “Double A’s” are Appreciation and Affection.
Appreciation can be rare in our world. A 4-year-old is not likely to say to his exhausted Mom, “Gosh Mom, you are doing a good job raising me.” There’s not a lot of appreciation for laundry done, dinner fixed, clothes washed. It’s a rare husband who says, “Thanks honey for carpooling the kids all over the place today.” Or, “I know you are tired from a stressful week at the office. I understand. I appreciate you.” Comments like these would do wonders to increase our battery life!
Affection is the second of our batteries that can become depleted. It’s hard for us women to get excited about sex if we haven’t experienced affection. It can make us feel cheap or used. Simply greeting us with a hug at the end of the day and saying, ”I missed you today,” can help to recharge our battery. Give us a hug in front of the kids while exclaiming, ”I love this woman,” and you hit the jackpot! A phone call or text message just to say, Hope you are having a good day, can make a huge difference.
So guys, it’s a wise man that asks himself, “Do my wife’s batteries need to be recharged?”
They probably do! Keep a small battery in your pocket as a reminder. (This made such a difference in one friend’s marriage that she handed out batteries at her husband’s memorial service!)
Take steps to recharge your wife’s batteries, but don’t be discouraged if she doesn’t respond right away. Sometimes it takes repeated efforts.
Just persist and we will light up in due time!
If you want to hear me discuss this further, here’s a talk I gave to the men in our church a little while back. Feel free to download and listen! (Just click the 3 dots on the right and you’ll be able to download the audio file.)
“For Men Only: Understanding the Women in your Life!”
Angelika Film Center – Falls Church, VA
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