I do not like to wait. I don’t like to wait for things to happen, for relationships to be fixed, for problems to be solved, for enlightenment to come, for suffering to end, for God to work. I don’t know anyone who really enjoys waiting. But life is full of waiting.
I often tell mothers of young children to teach their kids to learn to wait—to wait for their turn to play with a toy, to be able to purchase something they really want, to wait to be allowed to…
If they begin to learn to wait when they are young they will be more likely to wait for sexual satisfaction until married, to wait for the promotion they desire instead of cheating their way to achieve, to wait for a relationship to heal instead of quitting.
It can be particularly difficult to watch an older child have to wait. Our mother instinct wants to fix things for them; after all we spent many of their early years doing just this.
It’s an ingrained habit, born of love that’s hard to break. But now we watch as our adult child has to wait for a job, wait as she struggles with infertility, wait for the mate that hasn’t appeared or…
It’s hard on us because as Moms we suffer with them. Most of the time there is nothing we can do.
Sometimes there’s something we want to do but we should not, particularly if they older. They are adults now. We should not bail them out. So what can we do when we watch our children in the hard place of waiting?
We can give them perspective. It’s often in the waiting that God speaks lessons and words we would not hear apart from the waiting. Let them know that we aren’t panicked. We have lived long enough to know that God always comes through, on His timetable. God does what is best not necessarily what is fast. He is working while we are waiting.
We can pray for them. Pray that God will speak to them as they wait. Encourage them to be in the scriptures. The Psalms are especially helpful when we are in a waiting time because David is so honest about his frustrations and yet he constantly turns us back to the character of God.
We can affirm who they are. When our kids are in a hard place they need to be affirmed. “I am so proud of the way you are handling this. I see you growing in endurance and that’s a great trait.” Point out the unique gifts that God has given them…sensitivity, creativity, unusual people skills, hardworking, etc. Ask God to show you the uniqueness of your child.
We can run to God ourselves. Our kids need to see where we go in times of trial. Our faith is a security for them. Proverbs 14:26 says,
“He who fears the Lord has a secure fortress and for his children it will be a refuge.”
Ultimately it’s not we who are the refuge. It’s our faith in the Lord that will be their security.
While we watch our child wait we have a unique opportunity to hear from God personally ourselves.
“God, what would you teach me during this time? I want to hear from you. Please speak to me in a way that will draw me closer to you.”
And wait for His word of blessing!